Thursday, August 30, 2007

Fevered Sea Monkey Dreams

I never got to order those cool X-Ray Specs so I could casually spy unsuspecting females' underwear or (gasp!) maybe even their skin?. Nor did I get a chance to find out if the mighty and legendary Charles Atlas and his home bodybuilding course could really turn me from a 98-pound weakling into a real-life He-Man. But I did do the Sea Monkey gig and finally got to experience the thrill of raising alien babies right in comfort of my bedroom. You remember... those cute and mysterious water creatures advertised in all our comic books back when we were kids? I was stunned to discover I could create life in a jar for only a single worn dollar.

Thanks to The Phoenix for reminding me of another one of those magical times of my life when the amazing and impossible seemed within my grasp only to end up realizing that it was all a scam. Well, maybe not a scam but I'll be danged if I could ever keep them alive more than a few months.

Yes, Sea Monkeys ended up a major childhood disappointment for me but that didn't keep me from introducing them to my own children. Guess I had unrealistic hopes that twenty-something years of scientific advancement would change the outcome of ending up with a tank of stinky slime and no cute sea monkeys playing tennis or wearing lipstick.


Dave G said...

I was always intrigued by the monkey wearing the lipstick, and actually thought I might get to see some monkey olympics in the tank.......I didn't.

Bonez said...

I'm with ya', Dave. Even though I knew there wouldn't be any humanoid looking creatures birthed I did think the they would be larger and much more active... and LIVE a lot longer. I got my 12 year old a Sea Monkey set last year and he kept them alive for about four months which is a record in my family. Since researching this post I have decided we will give it one more shot to see how close we can get them to the projected 24 months per tank I read about. One good thing in the advancement of Sea Monkey technology has been their tanks. When I got my first batch back in the late 60's I think all I got was a packet of the dried eggs and had to use a jar for their tank. Of course, my memory is a tad foggy nowadays when I have to stretch it back that far so I may be wrong. What I am not wrong on is that there definitely were no sea monkey Olympics going on and not one of them even tried to drive the toy car I put in the bottom :)

Jay Noel said...

Great post, and thanks for visiting my blog.

X-Ray glasses was something I really wanted too, but maybe it was a good think I never ordered them either.

Bonez said...

Hey, Phoenix. Glad you dropped by Bonez and gave us a looksee. Yeah, X-Ray glasses would have been the bomb, eh? Hope you clicked on the links in the article to see a good video of what it is probably like to own a pair.